Posts Tagged ‘Low Self Esteem’

Ways to Build Students’ Self-Esteem

March 21st, 2010



One of the most difficult tasks for any teacher, whether beginner or experienced, is building self-esteem in students who clearly show a low level of confidence. The older the student, the more we struggle to build up his/her self-esteem, since we have to overcome several years of low personal opinion. The factors which cause low self-esteem are numerous and probably known to all of us: negative family atmosphere, absence of role models, taunting by peers, and lack of opportunities to demonstrate one’s real skills.

The components of self-esteem are four: what he/she thinks of their personal value, the kind of work they do and its consequences, personal achievements or lack thereof, and, most importantly, what they believe other people think of them. Simply talking to the students with positive words will never be sufficient; the task requires the following from all teachers:

Observe and Evaluate

Pay attention to each child’s demeanor. Their non-verbal language almost always reveals their attitude towards themselves. Are they slouching, keeping their head down, not looking at you in the eye, isolated, very few or no friends, or are they defiant, strutting with an apparently superior attitude?

The defiant child has not learned to trust adults, sometimes with good reasons. The isolated (from all other students) child may have been abused, or severely taunted as inferior, as dumb, as unskilled, by previous teachers (it happens, unfortunately) and by peers.

Regaining Trust

Your task as a teacher is to gain their trust, an arduous task indeed. Allow me the recent example of a diffident student who finally granted me his trust. I met Javier (not his name) approximately 2 years ago in my high school where he arrived as a shy, timorous freshman. After observing him for 3 months, I noticed that he occasionally wore the shirt of a famous Mexican soccer team. Since I am a former player, I thought I had found the key to his mental door of trust.

I started making conversation with him, after helping him out with his English essay, and discovered that the team he really admired was the Spanish Barcelona. I began mentioning some of the key players and how well the team had played that Sunday. Little by little, he opened up to me, until I discovered that he felt neglected in his family because he was the “sandwich” brother. He now confides in me by retelling almost every incident about his personal life. His grades are going up at the same time he accepts who he is and what he can and cannot do.

Successful Tasks, The Key To Self-Esteem

Any student can experience success in school, even when their low level of intelligence presents serious obstacles. Some of the disabled children (Learning Disabled, Health Impairments, Physical Disabilities, etc.) are especially susceptible to low self-esteem. They even believe that they incapable of learning. “I am dumb,” is an expression that I have heard too often.

We, the teachers, have the mission to devise tasks that less gifted children can perform successfully. If these accomplishments are followed by congratulations (sincere and genuine), the student’s self-esteem will shoot up immediately. Too often, schools and teachers devise lesson plans that expect the same from every child. That is a very serious mistake. We must differentiate not only in the way we present the material, but also adapt it to the time some students take to finish.

See Them Outside Of School

All children love physical and/or artistic activity and schools provide them with multiple opportunities. Take the time to go to their games or activities after school. You have no idea how happy they are to see their teacher on the sideline or in the audience. Talk to the parents and tell them how much progress Adrian has made in the last few weeks. They in turn will mention this to the student who will feel elated that his/her teacher talked to their parents in such a positive manner.

Patience and Time, Time and Patience

Yes, the task is arduous; do not expect immediate results. Do not even expect positive results in every case. Some children may have been damaged too much and need expert help (psychological). For every student for whom you have made a difference, there are many others who need your attention, your patience, and your time. Isn’t teaching wonderful?

By: J.C. Sprenger

How to Keep Harmony in a Family with Special Needs Children

February 6th, 2010



Peter was a hyperactive 7 year old child. He was disruptive and aggressive. He attended a Special Education school and was taking “Ritalin”. This helped him attain some kind of normalcy in his behaviour. In addition it enabled him to learn.

However Peter could not always control his behaviour and often times there were outbursts in the house. His Mother explained this to the children. She said she understood it might be embarrassing for them, especially in the presence of company. She gave them a book from the library to read, on the subject of “hyperactivity”. This proved to be an extremely useful aid for them. The book had a wealth of information, and advice.To the younger children Peter’s Mother gently explained Peter’s problem in a general way. She encouraged them to try not to provoke him and to be nice to him.

Parents have to realize that their special needs child is part of a whole family and just like she needs special attention and help to cope with her unique challenges, the other siblings also need help to deal and cope with their feelings of embarrassment, anger and fear. If these issues are not dealt with it they could grow up with low self esteem, pent up anger and difficulties to express their emotions.

Children can be explained certain facts about the special-needs sibling, in accordance with their level of maturity. Younger children can be spoken to in a more general manner, whilst older children should be given more information about the nature of the problem. Siblings should feel free to discuss any worries or doubts that bother them. This will help them maintain their self-esteem.

Siblings must understand their special-needs brother/sister encounters difficulties in many areas. They have to work on coming to terms with their feelings so that there should be a positive, constructive, productive home atmosphere. Parents should spend time talking to their children. If necessary, discussions should take place with each child separately and as often as required.

The parents should help the siblings of a special needs child:

To work on their feelings of embarrassment. To be accepting of situations that are difficult. To see the importance of helping in a the house more than their friends help in their houses.

To tackle points 1 and 2, explain your child that life’s situations are mostly not within our control. What is within our control is our attitude to life’s ups and downs. If we view a situation positively, as an opportunity to grow and become better human beings, we will be happier people. If we cannot change a situation, we must accept it. Focus on being positive and thinking positively.

Practical tips for siblings:

Don’t insist on having the last word, even if you are intelligent enough to win all arguments. Don’t insist on having your way, even if you are sure you are right. Try to keep slightly low-key about your accomplishments, when your special-needs sibling is around. Try to help out with whatever you can, to help alleviate the burden. Be encouraging and supportive to the other siblings. Above all, cultivate a positive attitude.

Harmony in the home is vital to ensure all children grow up well adjusted and with healthy self-esteem. This produces happy relationships to the benefit of all family members.

By: Shevach Pepper